Rivalry; Is it really Necessary?

Today I find the need to talk about this vice that continues to be a threat from our homes to the area outside our homes to the entire world. The vice is so huge that it continues to cause so much pain and destruction which I totally consider unnecessary. 

From the Google dictionary Rivalry is defined as competition for the same objective or for superiority in the same field. Rivalry can lead to healthy and unhealthy outcomes and it can be necessary and unnecessary. It’s safe to say that necessary rivalry leads to healthy outcomes. If we were to use game theory to calculate the risk it would be based on the grading we put on the type of rivalry and on the health outcome it brings on board. If you are into risk analysis I am talking of using likelihood tests. Anyway too much jargon let me try to simplify based on the understanding I need to share with us all today

Do you know as a parent one has a lot of power in determining the kind of rivalry a child chooses to pursue? We are all born pure it is the environment and everyday experience that renders us impure and stained. When a baby is born they adapt to crying as a way of communicating that which they need. Going forward they learn to speak and ask for what they need or will actually do both. And if they are in the terrific two they will put some actions to it like throwing themselves on the floor or slapping you to get you to give them that which they want, famously known as tantrums. 

Then from there they enroll into school and this is where the parents assess them based on their performance. Its not out of the norm for parents ask their children to aim to be position one. Is the position what matters in the end for real? This focus and upbringing is where the unhealthy rivalry foundation is laid. Allow me to lead you further into thoughts...

When a parent teaches their child the only time they are victorious is when they become first among several number of persons that is where a child loses focus. It’s no wonder that we have so many issues as a society as persons compete for senior management positions by discrediting their colleagues or worse still having children committing suicide because no matter the efforts they are putting in school they still are ranked last. So what then is the solution for this rivalry that leads to unhealthy outcomes?

How about teaching our children to outdo themselves. After all the only person with the ability that is a mirror of them is themselves. The minute we try to ask a fish to run while it was created to swim we go wrong. When a child is taught to outdo themselves it will not matter what the persons around them are doing. Their main focus will be self-improvement and that is more fulfilling. While we want to teach our children to be the best among students in their class, it can be limiting. The only way we are going to get the best out of any person here on earth is if we focused on outdoing our individual self.  A child can be number one in that class but if moved to another is graded last which can be really devastating particularly where a child is taught they are the crowned winner.

Don't relocate to a certain neighborhood because so and so has moved there. Move because its time you upgrade to another location. Don't buy a certain outfit because your friend has bought it and you think you would look better, buy it because you have the need to wear a dress or because it was in your plan to buy.  Don't do a church wedding worth millions because so and so did worth hundreds of thousands, do it because it is all within what you can afford. I am not saying don't look at what your neighbor is doing. No! 

It is time to look and use the information to better oneself from one position to another.  Don't look at your brother and start planning on how to discredit them so that you take up what they have. That will be a waste of time. One may successfully acquire a position by discrediting another but they would not last. Reason being they are probably built for something else. Let us realize that God created us equal and we are all to support each other here on earth. There is what each of us was created for and the only way we shall get to discover it is by focusing on improving the past self. Not competing against another.  A person's blessing shall always be their blessing . Let none of us think its in our capacity to block another persons blessing.

Well those are my thoughts for today.