Tuesday, 7 October 2014

Single Status


Today the african world seems to judge single persons so harshly, particularly ladies who cross a certain age. So harsh that some actually will propose that the lady gets a child fathered by any man just to seem normal. So harshly that a man engaged to be married would actually deny his fiancee just to get this lady "out of her misery" So harshly that a married man would actually propose to the single to have her as his secret affair and even father her child. So harshly that the married women avoid them because they think that they are "eyeing" their husband. So harshly that the men and women in the village talk behind their back saying they are not normal. So harshly that even the pastors in the church will hold prayers because they are biwitched and that is why no man can "eye them". So harshly that a man is willing to have sex with them to cure them of their sexual desires no strings attached. So harshly that even traditions have a special name for a lady that dies having not been married. So harshly that if they prosper as a single lady its because they are a walking business. So harshly that among the children the one that isn't married is treated like an outcast.

Its time we face and accept that marriage is an institution ordained by God. And just like we were not born at the same time by the same parents, marriage doesn't happen for all at the same time. Just like we have blind people and people with sight, we cannot all be married or be parents. Just because sugar is there not everyone puts it into their tea so not everyone feels they need to be sexual to live. Let us stop glorifying things that are not in anyone's control.

Singlehood isn't a disease that needs urgent cure no matter the cost. One can be single and happy , single and miserable , married and happy , married and miserable. Happiness will not be brought by a spouse and neither will fulfillment. Only God gives fulfillment and happiness will and always has been a personal responsiblity.

I know i have touched a raw nerve and the truth is i have no apologies all the same.


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