Your spouse is a Luxury

Today while in the office a colleague came and out of the blues we started debating about relationship matters.  He was of the opinion that every man needs a woman and every woman needs a man according to the African nature. I find it really interesting how many of us will want to hide along "African-ism" Many in arguments will pick out bits of African culture without knowing why they were practiced during that time. Some African practices were done because they fitted the time and conditions for that time. Say wearing skin as clothing. In this modern times that would be seen as not normal.

In our discussion we went on to talk on how many of us spend their life time moving from one relationship to another in the hope to find happiness. I was of the opinion that each of us was created complete and doesn't need a spouse to discover who they are. If you are waiting till you are married to find happiness or if you are married and running around searching  for happiness, you shall not find that which you seek. Yes a spouse should be a luxury. A luxury is something that one can do without , its there to bring you happiness but shouldn't be your only source of happiness.

Many of us once we get into relationships, forget who we are and instead live the life of our spouses. Getting married doesn't mean giving up on the person you were meant to be. That my friend will be the source of unhappiness. If we are not living the life our spouse wants for us we are busy trying to control them to fit in our schedule. So what happens when the spouse is no longer there to tell us how to live our life? What happens when our spouse is no longer there for us to control? Our life comes to a halt isn't it?

Is that how it was meant to be? Shouldn't we continue living our life with or without our spouse? None of us needs another to complete them. We are complete on our own. So the sooner  we realize that our spouse is there to spice things in our life and not to be the main dish the happier we shall be. We will be able to liberate each other when we are in a relationship and not tie each other.