It is really amazing
that our paths of life have crossed once more. Never did I imagine this
day would ever come to see the woman to who I owe my life to for
carrying me in her womb for 9 months. You truly are an amazing woman
mother because unlike the others you chose not to abort me. I thank and
bless God for your life every day that I have lived. Enough of chit chat
introductions let us head to the reason for this letter.
Years
ago while you were still a young woman, you, fell in-love with a man
and well as fate would have it a baby was conceived as a fruit of love. I
hear it was all celebrations as the first grandchild was ushered into
this world. Not forgetting a man’s first child to continue in his
linage. Unknown to the child the joy was not shared with the mother, she
felt she had lots to do than look after an infant, and well soon packed
her luggage and left a month’s old baby with its father and
grandparents. Well mother that child is me and as you can see years
passed and I am all grown up. Let me take you into my world of growing
up without you by my side mother.
A Girl to Her Mother
As a young girl the love of her father seems to be all she needs. Thanks
God father was the first born in his family and since there was no girl
in the family he had learned how to look after infants. Dad told me
stories of how he would feed me milk from the cow and the endless nights
he had to stay awake. Not forgetting my immunity was down and I would
constantly be hospitalized. God is good I did get past the toddler
stage. It was dad who would cook for us. He taught me how to make tea
and wash my inner wear. When adolescence kicked it was
then I realized I am missing out on a mother. How would I tell my father
to buy me sanitary towels? It seemed to embarrassing for me, mother.
As
the only girl in the family with no aunties to look up to life became
tough. I needed to talk to a woman as she probably understood what I was
going through. Boarding school didn’t make things easy either as dad
could not carry those pots of food that other children were brought by
their mothers. I would envy my friends when they talked about their
mothers. I would roll down on the floor cramping and dad would only
sympathize with me. Lucky for me we had a seminar and got to learn
some of the things we would do to ease the pain. Ha,ha,ha! I can laugh
now but then it was so embarrassing when dad took me shopping for
clothes. I learned the hard way how to be independent.
This
independence has only made things too complex for me in my adulthood.
My friends label me miss independent. A character that majority of men
will shy away from. All the same mother, I am hopeful to find my match.
In as much as I grew up without a mother, I am looking forward to being
the best mother in the world. See unlike you who didn’t care to stay; I
will stay and care for my children. I do not hate you and only pray you
can forgive yourself for neglecting me.
A Boy to His Mother
As
a boy the first love is always the mother. I had none of that and
didn’t know what that would feel like. When I cried dad would be hard on
me and tell me to man up that boys are not meant to cry. Yes I did
learn how to be a man but I really don’t know how to be around women.
When we went for trips back in high school, the thought of socializing
made me shiver. Even if a lady approached me for directions I would just
give a blank gaze. It’s not once I was thought to be gay just because I
don’t know how to talk to women. I grew up with so much
resentment towards women and pictured if my own mother would abandon me
what about a female stranger. I longed to have a nice home cooked meal
with the touch of a lady but there was no one to offer it.
When
I finally got the courage to talk to women, I became heartless. For me
no woman was worth giving my heart to and I never allowed myself to fall
in-love. I became a famous player from a gay suspect. I went through
university and started working. To maintain the many number of women I
knew I had to work hard and money was not a problem. It’s only recently
that I got a pal who did a wedding that I got the feeling of wanting to
settle down. I have been reading books and it’s the books that have
helped me understand that not all women are like you mother. I know I
will soon settle down with a lady and I have been praying she doesn’t do
to our children what you did to us. God knows I have a reason to hate
you but I choose not to because it would only mean I live a bitter life.
You took away a mother’s love I will not allow you to take away a
spouse’s love too.
To the Women out there
As
you can see my reader children who have missed out on mothers have lots
of challenges and questions. I have not exhausted them all and I am
sure each child brought up without their mother because she left them,
not by death, if asked to share their experience would have something
different. That notwithstanding, I only hope that I have passed on a
very important message to all women out there and that they will take it
upon themselves to be the leaders God called them to be.
Women
were called by God to be the helper I know that is not just any role.
Just like the head is joined to the neck to support the head so is the
woman’s role. If the head is moving in the wrong direction it probably
doesn’t have the right support system. Women need to realize they were
called to help and submit to their husbands. A woman is expected to
submit to her husband as the church submits to Christ. The church goes
humbling itself before Christ. Well what does that mean to you as a
woman?
Being
the helper means it’s upon the woman always support her husband through
encouraging him and praying for him. I know this will not be taken
kindly but it’s a fact. Support and submit to your husband and he will
love and respect you. Mistreat your husband and he will find comfort in
another woman.
Prayer for all our Women
May
God help the women of this world to learn how to be supporters and how
to be mothers to their children. May He also help them perform the roles
they were called to be, a helper and companion. May they understand
that by being helpers is not just pegged on material things; there is
more to it like words of comfort, concern … Amen
Thank you for reading.
Please note the picture of this lady is not the lady being talked about
